Rude Empath

Photo by Mario Ayala via dribble It might be safe to assume you do not have a personal chauffeur if you aren’t in the 1%. Save for the occasional COVID Uber where you ride back left with a little less than the stipulated social distance between you and the driver in the jam-weaving Suzuki Alto 400. However, using taxi-hailing applications on the regular wouldn't amount to a financially sustainable practice - unless you are Bezos, at which point you might as well own the franchise and its competitors. So, reliable public transport is the way to ride. However, the term reliable has lost its lustre to a point we do not consider all it encompasses: proper pricing, predictable routes, effective communication and calculable timing. No one, forgive the generalisation, living in the outskirts of Nairobi can say, "I paid normal fare rates despite it raining cats and dogs", not with their chest! Meaning people have had to stow their pride and make the tuma kitu call that they had ...

A philatelist collects stamps and a numismatist collects coins/medals. We are all too familiar with the tax collector who would have nothing to compile were it not for resilient entrepreneurs and their employees. I like collecting stories and recently Zee gave me one for the books. He had passed the preliminary round of interviews and knocked out the bulk of his competition to make it to the finals. Such violent words, so much for being an empath. Good eye, if only the interview committee's ears worked as excellently as your powers of deduction. Zee is warmed up with pop culture pop quiz as to who his current favourite musical artist is then it's a predictable right turn to "tell us about yourself". Luckily, he didn't dose off the night before while revising, How to Ace Your Next Job Interview and Impress the Panelist in One Fell Swoop , River Road Best Seller.   Soon after what he feels was blowing his own trumpet, albeit not too loud, came the money talk. Variou...

T he time is nigh to spread your wings and fly. This is about the extent of my poetic prowess in trying to express moving out. Whether one is looking for hostel accommodation or a three-bedroomed apartment, there comes a time to fly the coup. And the search is all but easy.  Photo: StuffWeLike Aside from the monthly rent budget, there are other factors for consideration. Proximity to amenities,  decent infrastructure, familiarity stemming from previous living quarters, locations visited, homes in which one has been hosted, HGTV and Pinterest (it's okay to admit it. This is a safe space).  Therefore, I compiled all the virtues a house should possess as building blocks to being a home. Might as well launch into adulting with high spirits, yes? The choices are limited to bedsitters, SQs and single rooms before working my way up the property acquisition ladder. This does not exempt me from viewing houses outside of my price range. One must have something to aspire to, as Teac...

M otorists using multimodal roads as their private F1 tracks, please! Spare us the unnecessary theatrics. Not until you can afford a personal race track. In the meantime, only allow your speedometer to clock 180 km/h in the dead of night on a clear road stretching for miles on end where there are few pedestrians if any. I see no downside. Should you gain entry into the great Ferrari track in the sky, let it be a ticket admitting only one: you! The fact remains that Kenyan motorists are starved for that nationally authorised speeds - 80kmph rightly popped into your mind - stuck in traffic for excessively long periods.  At the sight of a mere 15cm of road, it's pedal to the metal to make up for the lost time. Unfortunately, in the haste, road users who rank  lower  face higher risks resulting in negative cross-user biases.  Joe is the proud owner of a navy blue KAA 001A Subaru inherited from his maternal uncle's cousin. He conquers the dusty rough road from his ...

B illowing winds ferrying the fabulous fragrance of freshly dry laundry comes at a price. That once a week, one hour stint hunched over an assortment of buckets and basins to clear out the piling mountain of soiled clothes -between the two of us, it is to avoid accumulation over another week. A groan as I uncoil from the hunched position that had been imparted during an instrumental science class about machines: making work easier. Surely, any sensible human wants to lighten their load, within the bounds of the law, and washing machines plug seamlessly into my quandary. Obviously, washing on the verandah outclasses doing so by a river that could conceivably be crocodile-infested, but is it not the purpose of development to constantly improve upon the status quo?  Photo by Andrienne Anderson Here are three reasons I believe housing units should be fitted with a washing machine area or have a laundromat such as mimi fua ,  osha na coin in the locale but my favourite is...

R enovations are not that large an economic contributor east of the south of the Sahara, much less residential renovation. Not that I am claiming to be an authority on matters construction by any stretch of the imagination. However, a homeowner/tenant takes a few liberties to make their house acquire a homely ambience. Courtesy: Lucid Audio As such, a visit to congratulate my aunt on the birth of her baby girl coincided with a minor welding job. For one to elevate the habitability of a home with the arrival of a newborn is not uncommon. And the expectations were that the welders would take approximately 8 hours daily, for three days until the conclusion of their undertaking. Sparking and crackling as metal melded together was bearable. The grinding down of spatters, hammering of the steel bars for alignment_important practices for a good finish_ none of us were ready for! The fact that this carries on after-hours was most agitating. Me: Knock knock? Them: Who’s there? Me: Pissin’ The...